Saturday, December 1, 2012

green to grey

people will say everything's gray
scared is the way to be
but i've always seen infinite green growing so peacefully

even when my evenings are quiet
i can hear a whisper of something coming
even if i'm hungry
to try it
believe me darling, i'll stay patient
but feels like my hope's slipping away while i'm waiting here
feels like i go from gre
en to gray as i lose another year
skillfully i'm filling my time spilling my rhyme for free
caught in this glow

too proud to know
maybe the joke's on me
holding out for som
e perfect reason
staring at the skyline of expectation
never finding what i believe in
but i'll wait darling, if i have to

but feels like my hope's slipping away while i'm waiting here
feels like i go from green to gray as i lose another year
let it be youuuuuu

let it be youuuuuuuu
let it b
e youuuuuuuu
'cuz feels like my hope's slipping away while i'm waiting here
feels like i go from green
to gray as i lose another year
ohh, 'cuz feels like my hope's slipping away while i'm waiting here
feels like i go from green to gray as i lose another year
let it be youuuuu

i'm waiting
so let it be you
come and rescue me
let it be youuu
let it be you


Sunday, September 23, 2012


closet at home (my photography)

Ever felt like your world is slowly crumbling? 
This is one of those times... 
Last week I was nonfunctional due to stress, anxiety, worry, fear, life. 
It is so hard to be a full time student taking 19 units, including a musical, and applying for millions of different colleges.  There are doctors appointments I have to keep and remember, homework I have to turn in on deadlines, monologues and scripts I have to memorize and friends I need to keep and family I need to please.  I am not writing so you can take pity on me, but merely as a way to make all this mess in my head come out into a solid paragraph of words on here. This way instead of having all these to do lists flutter about in my mind emerging, flying away and then randomly coming back again... I can have it written down in a physical state. I need to go to voice lessons and rehearsals.  I need to start turning in my music theory homework and my english homework and god knows what else.  I have to visit an observatory... pronto before it gets cloudy.  I have to apply apply apply for all of these schools so I have a good future, and so I end up doing what I love, performing, but I want to be in the big leagues.  I also have to catch up on doctor who before my wonderful boyfriend dies of impatience, and I need to catch up on Once upon a time simply because I need to know what happens. I don't know where I would make time for that however.  And then there is study time, which has always and will always be so very very very difficult.  On top of all this I have to remember birthdays, and holidays and I need to be creative because that is who I am.  And I work too, making time for my job... 0.o 
Well I think right now I just need to go to sleep... but I need to start organizing myself.  Knowing due dates better, writing things down in a planner, post it notes need to become my new best friend.  And I think the biggest thing that will help me is to breathe... and tell myself it is going to be okay.  I really don't hear that enough, that it's going to be okay... it sounds foreign on my tongue. 

so it starts with sleep and a new day

<3 goodnight <3 

Sunday, September 16, 2012

sad is happy for deep people

sometimes people need to be sad... even if it isn't what they want.  Maybe there is a reason for sadness. 

 This song that Hunter Parish sings so beautifully makes me sad but makes me happy, it is the perfect song.  Sun sets make me sad... but happy... they are a reminder that the day is ending, but they are visions in the sky, art in nature, a natural beauty there for just a few minutes and then gone.  That makes me sad too, that sunsets don't last, that they disappear, and never again will you see the same one. 

Thursday, September 6, 2012

I love New York in June

I love New York in June.. or any other month for that matter... !! 

Tuesday, September 4, 2012


Kimbra is my new obsession. I love her music so much! go listen... 


OKAY !!! all you disney fans like myself out there get a load of this! 
So I went into the disney store today I saw they were marketing a bunch of Cinderella stuff but she didn't look like this: 

 (original Cinderella with a pale blue/silver gown and strawberry blonde hair)

and she didn't look like the later more vibrant version of Cindy: 

(platinum blonde and blue ass dress version)

OH NO NO NO NO NO ... She looked like this.....

.......... HELL TO THE NO DISNEY!!!!!!!

first of all... could they go anymore blonder than the second version...??? um apparently.
second of all... SIDE BANGS??? REALLY DISNEY?? REALLY!?!?
and third off... why does she look like a totally different person!?! her face looks a lot younger and more plasticy than Cinderella's face! And do NOT even get me started on the dress.

So for all my disney fans out there this is for you...

What do you think of New Cindy...?

Cinderella being my character I really don't like what they have done to her... (clearly)
and I think she was just perfect even before transformation to version two...

still love disney like a madman... but what the heck man...

Saturday, September 1, 2012

annoying blogger

So I made this amazing blog header.. and now my blog won't let me upload it... ferrrkk!!! 


This was my birthday present from my great friend NADAV! He is an awesome photographer. If he had a blog I would link it now>..< 
Anyway my wonderful boyfriend was the minion helper and Nadav managed to sneak him into a few photos which i am so happy for! I love him and I love these pics.  Thank you Nadav! He will be giving me more photos he has taken hopefully in the near future, which I will put on here for viewing pleasure. 

I have decided to blog more so hold on tight. 


♡ Dancing, singing and dreaming ♡

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

no day but today

I am so overdue to watch Rent and it is killing me.  I need to hear the words to the songs and let them sink into my brain. 

Monday, June 18, 2012

in 20 years time...

I have lived 20 years now.  It has gone by so fast.  I have learned so much.  Gone through so much.  

I have loved.  I have failed.  I have graduated.  Twice.  I have learnt how to walk, talk, stand, sit, read, write, sew, eat, dance, sing, and more. 

As each year passes I grow stronger from falling and getting back up.

I have made the most incredible friends.  Who have shaped who I am. . . sisters.

...sisters. friends. and partners in crime.

and my brother... has been my anchor... my best friend... (and most irritating too)

I have traveled across the world and met so many amazing people. <3 
this post is super cheesy I know but I just want to say thank you to the people who took the time to say hi to me, or ask me how I was feeling, or talked to me, get to know me.  You made an impact on me and I wouldn't be the same person without that. I hope the next 4/5's of my life are as enriching... with new faces as well as old. <3 

I thank and love my mormor for caring about me so much all my life, and being my mother the year I lived in Sweden.  

And lastly to my parents... as crazy as they may be I love them each very much.  They brought me up.

another year has raced by...

goodnight... or should I say morning... 

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Dream 4/28/12

Last night I dreamt that Beyonce cut my hair.  I know....I have really weird dreams.  She put extensions in it, bleached it and then dyed it blue like pastel blue.  She cut bangs which were surprisingly really straight, however she left a section of them uncut, which was crazy looking. My hair extensions were so long which I love, I really want longer hair, it went all the way down to my hips.  But she styled it and put it up so it was like a weird kind of funky modern Asian hairstyle.
I took it down later and was wearing my bangs like normal bangs, and I was complaining to everyone in my dream how I spent like 500 dollars to have Beyonce cut my hair and she messed up anyway!
I really wanted to dye my hair pastel pink, which, in my dream, happened at one point.  It was strange.
Then I was waiting for Jonah and we went to celebrate some holiday I don't remember what.  But he was waiting outside for the longest time so I finally went inside to the restaurant or whatever we were going to.  Hours later I am sitting at a table and finishing up my food alone, and I walk out.  As I am leaving I pass by a table and I see Jonah is sitting there with a bunch of friends and I am seriously mad.
Later on in the dream I bitch him out. :) Story of my life.  He slaps himself for me. All's well that ends well.
I also dreamt something about talking to India about joining anti stress groups that travel to the beach and have fun activities.  And I also dreamt something about a courtyard, and people throwing ice... I don't remember.
Anyway I am going to eat breakfast now.  Watch Twilight Zone with Mags.  And then later today Sweeney Todd! 

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

makeup, chicago, and new things, 30 days left...

Since my last few posts, and since My Fair Lady, I have done the show Chicago ( which is shown a little in the last four photos).  The first few photos of me, are for my makeup class that I am taking this semester! It has been such a fun class and I enjoy being creative and getting to think up designs.  Plus the class is with Maryanne.. what could be better?!

In other news, I am doing a couple of shows this summer that I am very excited about.  Sweet Charity and A Chorus Line.

And then as next year approaches I am gearing up to audition for Beauty and the Beast... we will see how everything plays out.

And in other OTHER news... I AM GOING TO DISNEYLAND IN 30 DAYS!!! (in an hour it will be 29!!) With my bff India who is a disney crazed chick needless to say!  I have been dying to go to Disneyland since I left there after my last trip!

I haven't blogged on here in a long time because I have FOUR Different Tumlbrs... I know ... it is kind of getting out of control... but tumbling is sooo fun!
check them out if you please:         --Disney!!!           ---Pretty Things!!!            ----Makeup/fashion!!!

and then the fourth one is just a blocked tumlbr where I post some of my really good photos I have taken... nothing too special from the fourth one.  But those three are all different !! CHeck em out!

I will try to post on here more often now!